What a Year
3/13/21
I'm so happy you're here. Thank you for joining me on this journey. Today marks the 1 year anniversary of the official start of the pandemic in Colorado. I was in a Yin Yoga continuing education course for teachers the day before, it was a weird time and the uncertainty was looming. Being in a training felt sacred. I felt held and safe with my fellow trainees. We washed and sanitized to the best we knew how. We practiced and traced meridians and took care with one another, body, mind and spirit. This feels like a lifetime ago. This feels like yesterday.
We walked away from the session with tools and skills that are imperative to our well being. We went into lockdown that next day, one year ago today. Yoga wasn't the first place I turned, it wasn't even the second. Fear and anxiety were my familiar go-to's in that moment. With a bit of panic and fear I returned to my mat and I returned to teaching that next week. The week of free floating into the ether without the remembrance of Self, felt like I was lost. Returning to teaching, now online, felt like a safety net. Familiar faces all screen bound and searching. We could connect. We could lean on Yoga. The salve for bruised hearts. We could rest in child’s pose and feel held. We could be in warrior and lean on our own inherent strength. The inner warrior. We could remember what yesterday felt like, pre-pandemic yet we could never go back. Savasana was the haven we could all be held by. 2020 held many shifts and changes. Much division and truth telling. We were broken open. We could use this time to heal, to break and come back again.
On this anniversary, dear friends, how are you moving through this time? Have you been reflecting or had it not crossed your mind? What have been your habits? How have you cared for yourself? I was on Roxane Gay's IG page earlier this week, she had reposted a reflection on self-care. 'Self care is not easy.' Word. Short and sweet. Self-care is not easy yet it is imperative to self-preservation. It is essential to my growth. When I take a stumble back from self-care I just feel off. I feel that same type of lost as I did the first week of quarantine. Aimless, wavering, wandering. Eventually I always come back to my practice, my cushion, my crazy-long baths, and snuggles with my dogs. It always feels like coming home. Home to me.
On this anniversary, how will you come home to yourself? Me? I am writing this as the snow falls and I am lucky enough to have heat and shelter. Sitting under my fuzzy blanket, I remember that I will be in the process of forgetting and remembering for many years to come. Hopefully shortening the span of time in-between. This for me is growth.
Thank you for your continued support and trust.